By big, I mean the 'only' interview I've had since leaving my job in February. I'm looking forward to it, I'm dreading it, you know, the usual. I was lucky enough to receive some advice from a friend yesterday, "You have what they need." Of all the things I thought I needed to hear, I wasn't expecting that and I'm grateful for the reminder.

That said, I spent the entire day thinking of all the things that they are going to ask me that I don't know how to answer. Then, I pictured myself throwing up all over their shoes in the middle of the Algonquin lobby.

I know, I know, I'll be fine. In fact, I'll be a winner. I may not be able to answer all their questions appropriately, not without additional research, more information, and a little less fear. I worry constantly about all the stupid things that trip me up, prevent me from succeeding, and am beginning to realize that that fear, more than anything, is a fight not worth fighting. I'm trying to give it up, not think about the fact that I don't know everything (in my last job, I knew everything) and remind myself that there are other people to learn from.

I had a very good friend that I miss bouncing ideas off of very much. We would talk about the dumbest bullshit and still come up with some really brilliant ideas. Things happen and things fall apart, I suppose.

Things could be worse. I'm watching John Adams and poor Abby Adams has breast cancer... it seems like a good idea to hack off a breast with no anesthesia... or... not. My life isn't so bad.

I can't wait to get a job. I can't wait to travel throughout the country, going to all the trade shows that I've always wanted to go to, learning from all the people I want to learn from, developing my own marketing strategies that no one has even thought of before and making a difference in this market. I love what the music industry stands for and I love the people it supports; if this is the way I was meant to help, I'm ready.